A Grande Dive into Poetry: Keeping Customs

Keeping Customs is the opening poem of my book. I wanted the book to have a flow that felt natural. I wanted the early poems to give the reader an understanding of the setting, the terrain to associate with the book. 

Keeping Customs puts you in a physical place and gives you a landscape to picture while also sharing themes of separation, longing, and the barriers between family members.

Read the full poem uninterrupted by commentary here.

Not from here, ni de allá

“Not from here, not from there.” This is a common sentiment in the Mexican American community. The idea that you can be born somewhere or with a certain identity that leaves you with no real home. You’re always in a sort of purgatory place. The nature of being Mexican American means you live directly beside your ancestors’ home. There are expectations placed upon you from people in the United States and people in Mexico. A popular monologue amongst the community on the subject comes from the movie Selena, a biopic of the 90s Tejano music star Selena Quintanilla-Perez. In the film, the singer’s dad says, “We gotta prove to the Mexicans how Mexican we are. We gotta prove to the Americans how American we are…It’s exhausting.”

One removed from the customs that bonded those before me

The embroidery that engulfed you so

The threads between you and I

I wanted to convey the longing for unifying traditions here. Growing up, I wore traditional Mexican clothes and often went to señoras’ homes who made garments. This was a normal occurrence in my hometown of Brownsville, Texas. It might seem odd to be in strangers’ homes so frequently, but I was a ballet dancer, so every year I needed many alterations for my costumes.

Sewing is an act of love and creativity in the Mexican community. It’s something I never learned how to do growing up. As an adult, it felt like something I should know how to do. Reflecting on my upbringing when writing this book, it was something I saw as a lost artform that those before me had.

I wanted the embroidery to represent this blanket wrapping around my family in Mexico who are closer to each other than they are to others in the United States.  The embroidery in Mexican clothing is intricate, beautiful, detailed, and layered. It is thoughtfully crafted by hand. In this poem, it represents more substance with those connections. 

In contrast, I reference threads when talking about a thinner connection between myself and those in Mexico. Threads represent a simpler, straightforward connection. There is no intricate, complex connection here. I simply possess the materials that could’ve created that beautiful embroidery. Or rather, that is all I’ll ever have. Just threads. 

I also felt a second meaning when referencing the threads. The threads represent a divide between us. They don’t serve as a connecting line. They are a dividing line.

Magenta that of love

Blue that of the Rio Grande

I wanted the reader to envision the color of the threads. Vibrant colors are common in Mexican art and clothing. Magenta is a commonly used color, especially for young girls’ clothing. My old dance teams would often use it when performing traditional Mexican dances. 

That blue that separates us

The blue you’d all view together

That side of the river

The Rio Grande River separates the United States and Mexico. This is a physical barrier, but it also serves as a manmade geographical limitation. A border, a restriction, something intended to divide. This division is a recurring theme in the lives of Mexican American people. The river serves to represent that in this poem.

Feet in the desert

Bare and content

I included this section because I wanted to convey that even with nothing, being bare, exposed, those on the other side of the river have something together that I’ll never have. They have a family life and culture rooted in Mexico. That sort of closeness, tradition, family involvement, those are all things I didn’t get to have.

Learning to sew now

To keep my garments vibrant

A stitch of story, a hem of home

I’d wear the wardrobe of us both

This section is a reclaiming of my identity, culture, traditions. While I didn’t have the closest connection to my identity and traditions as richly as my Mexican family members, it is up to me as an adult to carry on what my ancestors did. Sewing serves as a metaphor for keeping my identity and its history alive.